Autoimmune disease and marriage is tough stuff.
I opened up and shared on Instagram the other day how difficult my autoimmune disease is on my marriage.
I received many, many comments, DMs, and emails from my fellow autoimmune sisters who related to what I shared.
As a result, my husband agreed to open up and answer questions from my Instagram audience and friends about his experience with my autoimmune disease and chronic illness.
I posted the news in my Instagram Stories, and received many questions for my husband over a 24 hour period.
The next day, I sat down with my husband and began asking him questions he had no warning of. Here is the video of our chat:
I received so many questions that we decided to break it up into multiple parts, so stay tuned for Q&A with my husband Part 2!
In case you missed my original Instagram post, here it is:
My autoimmune disease came in like a wrecking ball to my marriage.
Both in the years leading up to my diagnosis, and after diagnosis.
My autoimmune disease diagnosis came just days before our 17th wedding anniversary.
How did we get through it, before and after diagnosis?
It was not always pretty.
Sometimes it was downright ugly.
But in time, I learned to effectively communicate my health symptoms, needs, etc.
Here are some tips that helped my husband and I:
I avoid hinting at what I need. My man is not a mind reader.
Ask for help.
My husband wants to fix things. He cannot fix this. So I ask him for help where he can.
I consider my man’s point of view, and try to understand if he says no he cannot help. I love and accept him anyway.
Remember his feelings.
As hard as living with a chronic illness is on me, it is hard on him too. My husband has to watch the person he loves most in this world struggle and he save me from it. He may not say it, but it tears him up inside. He needs support too, and to know I got this….even on crappy days.
I tell him. I show him. He needs me. Your man needs you.
Cut him some slack.
Communication is hard. Give yourself a break, and him a break. It’s going to be really messy at first. It takes time to learn, to rebuild trust, and to mend old wounds.
Dancing Barefoot in the Kitchen.
I am convinced that dancing barefoot in the kitchen with my man makes everything better! I recommend it daily.
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